At the wedding, a lot of people mentioned "have lots of kids." I get it, first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes Leila and Tim with a baby carriage. For the record this is not my first ride on the marital merry-go-round. I was married from 2001 to 2006 to someone who is still, in my eyes, a very good, outstanding man. He just wasn't the right good man for me. My divorce was a pretty big upset for my family who had finally accepted my haole husband. One of the reasons we didn't work was he was pressuring me for kids. I was 22, recently graduated Magna Cum Laude from the University of North Carolina Wilmington with a B.A. I didn't want kids.
Tim and I have been together for not quite 3 years. While I have decided that kids would be nice, I'm a big fan of waiting. Hey, it's a step up from me not wanting kids, period. I want to make sure Tim and I have a good, solid relationship. Bringing a child into this world should be a serious decision made by both the parents, when they are both ready and probably after a trip to a therapist to prepare us. Right now, I am enjoying my time with Tim too much to consider a child. I want to make sure our foundation is solid, that we mend any possible cracks and dig out any intrusive roots before we "settle down" and "make babies."
Children are a beautiful, wonderful, exciting thing. I just want the wedding excitement to lull for say 3-5 years before I set about on a new adventure. Above all, I am excited about my new life and my future with Tim. I love that there are so many people ready and waiting to play babysitter to our future kids.
Deep breaths, our babies will happen, when we and the world are ready. Plus, there's always adoption.
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